Transition from dependant childhood to independent adulthood

Dr Ashwini Anil Kumar Sirapanasetty
Contd from previous issue
Social Changes
The most important task of social development in adolescence is the search for identity. This is often a lifelong voyage that launches during adolescence. Along with the search for identity comes the struggle for independence. Your child may:
1 Develop an interest in their sexuality & romantic relationships.
2 Turn to you less in the midst of challenge.
3 Show more independence from you.
4 Spend less time with you & more time with their friends.
5 Feel anxious, sad or depressed which can lead to trouble at school or risks taking behaviours.
Identity Development.
Identity development occurs when your child discovers a strong sense of self and personality, along with a connection to others. Positive self-identity is important because it shapes your child’s perception of belonging throughout their life. A positive self-identity is also associated with higher self-esteem. You can help reinforce a positive self-identity in your child by:
1 Encouraging their efforts
2 Praising their good choices
3 Inspiring perseverance
How social media affects adolescent development?
Social media can negatively impact your child’s health and development. Adolescents report cyberbullying and exposure to inappropriate content online. In addition, socialising online isn’t the same as socialising in person. Adolescents miss out on key facial expressions and body language that they only see when they connect with a person face to face. Adolescents may also feel bad about themselves when comparing themselves to others they see online. All of these factors can lead to lower self-esteem, depression and anxiety.
Key Role of Parents in Healthy Adolescent development
Adolescence can be a trying period for both you and your child. But your home doesn’t have to become a battleground if you make special efforts to understand one another.
1 Give your child undecided attention when they want to talk. Don’t read, check your email, watch television or busy yourself with other tasks.
2 Listen calmly & focus on listening to understand your child’s point of view. Reflect back to what you have heard.
3 Speak to your child courteously & pleasantly as you would to a stranger. Your tone of voice establishes the mood of conversation.
4 Understand your child’s feelings, even if you don’t always approve of their behaviour. Try not to make judgments. Keep the door open on any subject. Be an “open/approachable” parent.
5 Avoid humiliating your child. Don’t laugh at what may seem to you to be naïve or foolish questions & statements.
6 Help your child to build self confidence. Encourage their participation in activities of their choice (Not Yours)
7 Make an effort to commend your child frequently & appropriately. Too often we take good things for granted & focus on the bad. Your child needs to know that you appreciate them.
8 Encourage your child to participate in family decisions making & to work out family concerns together with you. Understand that your child needs to challenge your opinions &your ways of doing things. This is how they achieve the separation from you that’s essential for their own adult identity.
Dr Ashwini Anil Kumar Sirapanasetty is Obstetrics and Gynaecologist Surgeon Anil Kumar Sirapanasetty who is a Serving Army Officer. Senior Counsellor in Army wives welfare Association.Her recent research work on Human Desires and Sexual Ethics has been selected for International Conference conducted by British Association for South Asian Studies. She is also a Tribal reformist.