Mahatma Gandhi, ‘Mother’ of the Nation
11-Aug-2024
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Dr T Deepamanjuri Devi
It is said that when Lord Mountbatten, the last Viceroy of India came to hand over the news of ‘delivery’ of the two ‘Midnight Children’- India and Pakistan, he was greeted with two unusual scenes- one, the Mahatma or Father of the Nation, M. K Gandhi was doing open toilet, while Jawaharlal Nehru, the future Prime Minister of India, was standing on his head (doing the headstand yoga pose)! Mountbatten was worried what would be the future of India if the rein of India was handed over to the peculiar men in front of his eyes. The ‘complex’ simplicity of India and the Indians was beyond the grasp of the English Gentleman. The simple beauty and charm of the half naked old man with a stick, and the enchanting smile he wears cannot be so easily forgotten. Although Sociologists are a little bit ‘sceptic’ about the ‘truth’, and the experiments that Mahatma does with ‘truth’ never fail to attract our curiosities.
There were different facets of ‘truth’ that the ‘Mahatma’ wanted to experiment with - ‘Satyagraha’ i.e. non-violence, and abstinence constitute the core of his concept of ‘truth’. Who has not heard of Mahatma Gandhi’s ‘Satyagraha’ or non-violence or for that matter his ‘abstinence? But the most interesting part of Gandhiji’s quality for me is the ‘maternal’ aspect of his personality. While I feel that it is this quality in the Mahatma that made him stand out from among the various great personalities of the world. This side of Gandhiji’s personality is a hardly talked about topic among scholars or in popular writings. Maybe because nowadays, ‘motherhood’ is being perceived as a stage in a woman’s life with some ‘mixed blessings’. It is both a source of strength as well as weakness for a woman as a person. Unlike other animals, the human animal depends on its mother for a long period of time for survival. As said by the novelist Deshpande, the relationship between a mother and her child is a relationship that is ‘entangled with blood and pain.’
For psychoanalysts like Sudhir Kakkar, the image of a good mother is a male construct. For Simone de Beviour, becoming a mother fulfills a woman’s physiological needs. The role of a mother is learned during the socialization process of a girl child. The society already has a well written script about ‘good mothers’ and ‘bad mothers’ as well. What type of role of mother one adopts depends on the ‘success’ of the socialization process.
For me, one of the most controversial roles of motherhood in history must have been the role of mother played by Gandhiji - to Manuben, his grand niece and companion till his last moment. Manuben was a young girl who just lost her mother when she was selected by Mahatma for his experiment with celibacy. While many girls were disappointed at not choosing them, Manuben was completely a changed person after her close relationship with Gandhiji. The psychological impact the experiment has had on the young Manuben was not taken into consideration by Gandhiji, felt Sudhir Kakkar. On the other hand, one of our founding fathers of Social Anthropology/Sociology in India - N.K Bose, who was also one of the PAs of Gandhiji felt that Gandhiji should not have done the experiment. He requested the Mahatma time and again to call off the experiment. He was not very happy with how Gandhiji’s actions were received by the people in the country. Maybe it was because of these controversies that the maternal aspect of Gandhi’s personality is a hardly talked about topic, or not a popular topic at all.
Manuben was once asked by a Journalist on how she felt while participating in the experiment with Gandhiji, she replied, ‘it was like sleeping with her mother.’ The simplicity with which Gandhiji did the experiment on his celibacy and the trust that the young Manuben had on the Mahatma will remain a mystery for wise men and intelligent women, especially of the West! After all, as Prof. J.P.S Uberoi, the famous Social Anthropologist had once said, the East and the West percieved things from two points contradictory to one another. The East starts thinking by first asking why things are ‘absent’, while the West looks at why things are ‘present’ in the first place. The presence/absence contradiction can be regarded as the foundation for the difference that the West has with the East.
Coming back to Manuben, she was there with Gandhiji when the Father of the nation was shot dead by Nathuram Godse. Manuben died at 40 years of age ‘as a lonely spinster’. While Gandhiji’s grand niece was an interesting character of sensitivity and devotion, I am more interested in our attitude towards ‘motherhood’ these days. I brought in the relationship between Gandhiji and Manuben just to highlight how Gandhiji was ultimately successful in becoming a ‘mother’ to Manuben. While some people are obsessed with becoming a mother, some are of the view that motherhood is a burden for women. Is becoming a mother really a burden? Many ‘feminists’ feel so. Family and marriage along with motherhood make women weak and dependent on others which further lowers her status in the society, according to ‘hard’ Feminists. I know many women who otherwise would have become ‘good mothers’ who decide to remain single and ‘independent’. There are always both ‘good’ and ‘bad’ sides of things. Motherhood is both a blessing as well as curse for some women. However, what scares me is that if the majority of the female gender decides to opt for an independent single life without children, what will happen to the human population.
This worry is not without foundation. The total fertility rate or TFR of the whole globe is said to have been halved over the past seventy years. It was around five children per female in the 1950s to just two point two children in 2021. It is not just about East or West, but also about more than half the countries of the world, a phenomenon that affects almost all parts of the globe. If this had been happening in only some sections of the society, it would not have been such a worrisome issue. Demographic change of such a kind as a ‘social fact’ is of serious concern for Sociologists. Many factors are responsible for decreasing TFR in the globe. Socio-economic factors, ideological factors, personal choice factors, and various other lifestyle factors and health issues are said to be responsible for the declining fertility rates in the world. In India, studies found that such factors like obesity, stress, smoking, environmental pollution, etc. are responsible for the decreasing fertility rates.
It is difficult to comment on other factors without proper studies available. But if it is the case that women choose to abstain from becoming mothers because of reasons that have to do with responsibilities, there are possible solutions to the problem. I would suggest only two practical solutions: one, sharing responsibilities; and two, propositions for a ‘maternal perspective’ as one way of looking at things which is the need of the hour if we want to save lives as well as humanity.
Families with working couples have certainly learned the practical necessity of sharing responsibilities, regardless of whether one is ‘man’ or ‘woman’. Mahatma Gandhiji is one glaring example that ‘maternal’ attitude can be ‘learned’ as well. His ‘Ramrajya’ in my opinion is nothing but an application of the ‘maternal’ perspective of ‘karuna’ as the means as well as the end in life. The character of ‘Rama’ is a symbolic representation of this ‘karuna’ in person. Adopting such an approach would make the world a more peaceful and beautiful place for humanity to survive and carry on his/her worldly businesses. I would give the Mahatma the credit of introducing such a perspective for making the world a better place to live. Through his experiments with ‘truth’, Gandhiji has certainly shown the world that man can be a ‘perfect’ human being if he cultivates this ‘maternal’ quality in him. Many women won’t mind bearing the pang of giving birth if they learn to activate the mothers in them as well. Gandhiji has shown the way. Gandhiji was the embodiment of motherhood, the characteristics of loving and caring for humanity, tenderness and resoluteness, and above all the absolute strength. In Hindi they refer to these characteristics as ‘Mamta’ but Hindi does not normally talk about any term as an antonym of Mamta. Does Hindi have something called ‘Bapta’ for fatherly characters? I doubt. Just an ingenious thought. The Mahatma is male by sex but Mother by character, so the Mahatma is ‘Mother’ of the nation.
Salute to the Mahatma, the mother!